Definitely strayed a little today. Whatever. Nobody is perfect. I think Mastin said to allow for some failure. It could have been worse - A LOT worse.
Anyway. Part of me feels like a twenty four (almost) year old shouldn't be responding this harshly to a breakup. I've been trying to read some blogs out there and get a feel for what people are posting. I seem to be on the drama level of the teenager bloggers out there. Who knew that a quarter way through my life and a graduate degree later I'd still be responding to heartbreak the way I did when I was 17. Forever young is a kick in the Sevens.
Good news - I slept well last night. Probably due to the whopping 4 hours of sleep I got the night before. But I'm crossing my fingers it was because of the pre-bed meditation and yoga. Exhausted myself again today. 6AM wake-up yoga session, full work day, and 30 minutes of intense cardio. A full work day is enough to make me want to crawl into bed the moment I walk through the door. Teaching can be a bitch. My job is the reason for the pseudonym (you didn't really think my name was codi love did you?) and lack of names for the people in my life - getting sniped out for writing this, is the last thing I fucking need.
It did feel weird today I must say. Somehow it felt like I just wasn't myself. Although when I was teaching I was, but then I would sit down for a second and it would all come rushing back. I hope this feeling is temporary. At least I have my students to consume my brain for the bulk of the day.
Idk whatever. Now I'm rambling. And it's time for bed.
About Me
Monday, October 4, 2010
FAIL
I left my phone at home today (half on purpose) and when I returned from work I had a text message from GameStop informing me that my NBA 2k11 preorder would be in tomorrow. Howw wonderful for that to come through at a time like this. Obviously this was an order placed for ex. After an internal debate over what to do. Now, my best had texted me an hour earlier saying that he was at the gym. Knowing ex - ESPECIALLY in breakup mode - I knew he would probably still be there. I decided I would head to the gym in hopes that I would catch him there to hand him the invoice so that he could retrieve the game. (BREAKING THE CLEANSE RULES I KNOW).
My printer also chose this exact moment to SUCK anndd 3 paper jams later I gave up and emailed it to him. So much for that solution.
I went to the gym anyway, because, let's be serious here, I'm in breakup mode too. And like a DUMBASS I called him when I saw that his car was not in the gym parking lot. I told him the situation with the game and he said he would pick it up tomorrow so that I would not get charged. He was surprisingly nice/polite, which kind of freaked me out. I tried hard to stick to the topic but ended up asking him if he had anything else to say. He said no, and asked if I did. Idiotically, I said I don't know. And then proceeded to ask what the "wow" text was about yesterday. He informed me that he was just surprised to come home and see that. Which basicallyyyy says to me that he didn't really expect all the semi drunk nonsense of Saturday night to translate into a real breakup.
Much to my own surprise I did not give into this charade and simply stated that I thought he would want his things back, and I didn't mean to be rude it wasn't like I returned presents he had given me. Now at this point, typical ex would have made some sort of snide/rude remark. Instead he chose to play the nice card. Which was.. well.. nice. Anyway we got off the phone which he ended with a "talk to you later". Now typical me would have made some sort of snide/rude remark replying that no he would not. But I decided to play the nice card as well.
Mature way to handle this?
The jury is still out on that one.
My printer also chose this exact moment to SUCK anndd 3 paper jams later I gave up and emailed it to him. So much for that solution.
I went to the gym anyway, because, let's be serious here, I'm in breakup mode too. And like a DUMBASS I called him when I saw that his car was not in the gym parking lot. I told him the situation with the game and he said he would pick it up tomorrow so that I would not get charged. He was surprisingly nice/polite, which kind of freaked me out. I tried hard to stick to the topic but ended up asking him if he had anything else to say. He said no, and asked if I did. Idiotically, I said I don't know. And then proceeded to ask what the "wow" text was about yesterday. He informed me that he was just surprised to come home and see that. Which basicallyyyy says to me that he didn't really expect all the semi drunk nonsense of Saturday night to translate into a real breakup.
Much to my own surprise I did not give into this charade and simply stated that I thought he would want his things back, and I didn't mean to be rude it wasn't like I returned presents he had given me. Now at this point, typical ex would have made some sort of snide/rude remark. Instead he chose to play the nice card. Which was.. well.. nice. Anyway we got off the phone which he ended with a "talk to you later". Now typical me would have made some sort of snide/rude remark replying that no he would not. But I decided to play the nice card as well.
Mature way to handle this?
The jury is still out on that one.
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